He feels that his failure is more devastating to him than it is to you. So when you find him with his fists in his hair and his heart in his mouth, remind him that his worth is not in his words alone but in his heart, and you wouldn’t have him any other way.
When he’s drained and consumed, love him most. When he feels defeated and ready to give up, love him so much that you bring to life every cell in his that has almost died.
I’m sorry if I look at your
feet instead of your lips
when you told me you love
me. My whole life, people
just kept coming and going,
while I kept waiting and
hoping. The four-letter-word
I know for love is stay.
Before morning comes to steal
the night we spent together,
I hug you closer, tighter, hoping
that time slows down to accommodate
our moments of quiet contentment.
But you were staring at the ceiling
and holding your breath. I know
what’s about to happen. I hate that
I do, but you say it anyway:
“You know how badly I want to be
with you, but I’m with her, this
can’t go on, this isn’t real.”
How nice it must be that you can
turn me into a ghost, how nice
it must be to dictate reality,
but you’re wrong. I am very real.
And so were we, for a moment.
You’re so used to impermanence that
you learn to fall in love with an exit
strategy. You think that’s being safe.
You kiss people in small doses so you
don’t get attached. But you still do.
That’s how you give yourself up in pieces.
So this is how it is,
to be pressed against your body..
this is fragility, this is my downfall,
this is how glass is made, this is how I will break.
This is me walking into my destruction and this is love.
This is me nude, stripped of clothing and vulnerability,
this is you and me, this is “we.”
This is shelter for the battle ahead,
one that we were never bound to win.
There are days when I feel like I am a filler for everything,
I am just a way to pass time. I know this because when we talk,
we don’t ponder on the meaning of life, you don’t ask about
what makes me happy, or what makes me sad,
you don’t even know how I feel at this very moment.
My feelings are insignificant coz they don’t impact you.
We live in a world where being alone is a terrifying concept.
I don’t blame you if you hold on to anyone who’s willing to
stay beside you and listen to you. Even as you read this,
my words are filling your time. But when this poem is done,
I will leave, and you will need someone new to
occupy the empty spaces inside and beside you.