Before morning comes to steal
the night we spent together,
I hug you closer, tighter, hoping
that time slows down to accommodate
our moments of quiet contentment.
But you were staring at the ceiling
and holding your breath. I know
what’s about to happen. I hate that
I do, but you say it anyway:
“You know how badly I want to be
with you, but I’m with her, this
can’t go on, this isn’t real.”
How nice it must be that you can
turn me into a ghost, how nice
it must be to dictate reality,
but you’re wrong. I am very real.
And so were we, for a moment.
He’s not a poet.
He doesn’t know
how to say things
You’re so used to impermanence that
you learn to fall in love with an exit
strategy. You think that’s being safe.
You kiss people in small doses so you
don’t get attached. But you still do.
That’s how you give yourself up in pieces.
I want no ordinary love.
One that defies reason.
One that redefines romance. Continue reading “No ordinary love”
So this is how it is,
to be pressed against your body..
this is fragility, this is my downfall,
this is how glass is made, this is how I will break.
This is me walking into my destruction and this is love.
This is me nude, stripped of clothing and vulnerability,
this is you and me, this is “we.”
This is shelter for the battle ahead,
one that we were never bound to win.
*As requested by @midnight_m for #bemymuse no. 4.
There are days when I feel like I am a filler for everything,
I am just a way to pass time. I know this because when we talk,
we don’t ponder on the meaning of life, you don’t ask about
what makes me happy, or what makes me sad,
you don’t even know how I feel at this very moment.
My feelings are insignificant coz they don’t impact you.
We live in a world where being alone is a terrifying concept.
I don’t blame you if you hold on to anyone who’s willing to
stay beside you and listen to you. Even as you read this,
my words are filling your time. But when this poem is done,
I will leave, and you will need someone new to
occupy the empty spaces inside and beside you.
I am afraid that you will keep trying to open me up
only to find out what haunts me nightly.
I am afraid that you will only see how
I am composed of just trivial things like bones and muscle,
blood and sinew. I am afraid that you will wear out my heart
every time you make it beat beat beat
ninety six times every sixty seconds
when you’re around.
I am afraid.
There’s no point in looking outside for things you should have inside. It will only bring you harm. Don’t put your happiness in a stranger’s hand. No matter how long you’ve been with someone, unless you’re both open to it, you never really know them. And even when they are, you still don’t. So how can you let them guide you and follow blindly? Communication is key. Respect is foundation. Commitment is basic. Love? Love is like the cherry on the top. Or you really thought all of the couples you know that have been together for so long were so because of “love”? No, my dear. They’re together because they want to, because there’s those three things and a thousand more reasons to stay. Nowadays it’s harder and harder to find people willing to stay. So when you do, when you finally feel good with yourself and find that one person that stays throughout all seasons, you stay. It’s probably new to you and everything inside you tells you to leave, but don’t run away. Stay true to yourself, open and honest. Talk to them and listen. Respect them and commit. And when asked, tell people you’ve found love because, in the end, isn’t that what love is?
© Máh Lima
It hurts in a place no map leads to.
Even pirates would not find the pearl lost into intricacies of your scars.
Find your way among the hidden sunken ships and dying coral reefs that is my chest.
Unlock those cages where my unspoken words
reside, let them free and feel their existence.
Reduce me not to the barest of words or pronounce me like I were she.
You have come so close, look around, this part of island still carries our
footprints. I’m afraid that your blurred vision might overlook the renaissance.
I am always close to you no matter how far you are. Our memories sleep
at the tip of my tongue, where your name is soft and warm in my mouth.
Collaboration with Alok Dhuri. Check him out in instagram here.